


a snake by any other name

by asideofourown



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Don't copy to another site, Established Relationship, M/M, POV Outsider, Post-Canon, Snake Crowley (Good Omens)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-05
Updated: 2019-09-15
Packaged: 2020-07-31 11:35:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,039
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20114446
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asideofourown/pseuds/asideofourown
Summary: Elena was on her way home from class when she happened to turn her head at just the right moment and sawitthrough the window of the bookshop.Itbeing a large, black snake curled up on a chair in the last patches of quickly fading sunlight.Elena jerked to a stop with a gasp, right in the middle of the pavement.  She all but pressed her face to the window, studying the snake curiously.  It was quite large, even coiled as it was in its big leather armchair, and although its golden eyes appeared to be open, she could tell that it was probably snoozing.  “What abeautifulcreature,” Elena said to herself in a hushed, awed voice, and then made the snap decision to go inside the shop for another look.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Alternate summary: a herpetologist sees Snake Crowley and just loses their goddam mind
> 
> Enjoy!

Elena had lived in London for twenty years, and in the Soho area for nearly ten.So of course, she was at least passingly familiar with A. Z. Fell and Co’s Bookshop, in an abstract way.She had never felt the need to actually go inside— Elena liked reading as much as the next person, it was just that the sort of books inside A. Z. Fell’s looked old and kind of expensive— but she had walked by plenty on her way to and from work or class.

She was on her way home from class, in fact, hurrying through the dusky evening in the hopes of beating her flatmate home so _she_ could choose what takeaway they would get for dinner, when she happened to turn her head at just the right moment and saw _it _through the window of the bookshop.

_It_ being a large, black snake curled up on a chair in the last patches of quickly fading sunlight.

Elena jerked to a stop with a gasp, right in the middle of the pavement.Soho was still bustling, and a few people pushed past her with some muttered rude words before she had the presence of mind to step better out of the way, closer to the window.

Elena all but pressed her face to the window, studying the snake curiously.It was quite large, even coiled as it was in its big leather armchair, and although its golden eyes appeared to be open, she could tell that it was probably snoozing.“What a _beautiful_ creature,” Elena said to herself in a hushed, awed voice, and then made the snap decision to go inside the shop for another look.She was so excited, and in such a hurry, that she didn’t even notice the little sign on the door proclaiming the shop closed as she entered with the cheerful tinkle of a bell.

Elena paused in the doorway, letting the door swing closed behind her as she took in the bookshop.It wasn’t lit very well, the narrow paths between shelves very quickly fading into shadows and only a few lights and lamps scattered around to fight the darkness, and it smelled rather musty... yet there was a familiar, almost comforting air to the place.

Elena cautiously hefted her bag a little higher onto her shoulder before calling out, “Hello?”

From the back, somewhere hidden among the shelves, a voice called back, “I’m sorry, we are _quite _closed.”A moment later, a man who could only be the bookshop owner bustled out, frowning just slightly.He was on the older side of middle aged, with fluffy blond hair and a bow tie.He blinked a bit owlishly at Elena, as though surprised that she hadn’t left yet.

Before he could kick her out, Elena said quickly, “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you were closed, I wasn’t exactly looking to buy any books anyway.”She winced slightly.That probably wouldn’t exactly endear her to the owner of a bookshop.

But to her surprise, the man seemed to relax a little, and his frown changed from displeased to confused.“Then what can I help you with, my dear girl?” he asked.

Elena shuffled her feet, and then decided to go for broke.“I, ah, I saw your snake through the window, and I just _had_ to come in for a closer look.I’m thinking of studying herpetology, you see, and—”

“My snake?” The bookseller (Mr. Fell?That was probably right) interrupted, sounding puzzled.Elena’s stomach sank.How could he not know that he had a massive snake in his shop?If he didn’t know about it, he probably wouldn’t want it around, and Elena would never forgive herself if she got the authorities called on such a lovely reptile.

And then, to her relief, the bookseller’s expression cleared, and his eyes lit up in recognition.“Oh!” he said, clasping his hands in front of himself.“Great big black thing, probably lazing around in the sun?”Elena nodded.Mr. Fell smiled fondly to himself.“That wily old serpent.”

“Can I see him closer?” Elena asked eagerly.

Mr. Fell’s smile turned a little mischievous, and he said, “I don’t see why not.He’s been lying around plenty.”

“Thank you!” Elena exclaimed.Mr. Fell smiled warmly, perhaps just a bit bemused, and beckoned her into the shop, weaving through the shelves until they reached the small nook by the window where the snake was still napping in his chair.

Elena stood back just a bit as Mr. Fell approached quietly, and gently ran a hand over the snake’s back near his head, murmuring, “My dear boy, we have company.”The snake seemed to come alive at that, coils rustling as he raised his head.If he weren’t, well... if he weren’t a snake, Elena would have been sure that he made eye contact with her, and almost looked _irritated_.

“That’s what you get for being so slothful,” Mr. Fell said with that same, teasing smile, and then slid his hands under the weight of the snake’s coils and lifted him up.The snake hissed lowly and slithered almost grumpily in his grip until he was draped over the bookseller’s shoulders like a large, scaly scarf.

Elena gasped in delight and stepped closer, studying him admiringly.“He’s so lovely,” she said, and reached out to gently run her fingers over his snout.The snake hissed threateningly, and Elena withdrew her fingers just slightly, looking questioningly at Mr. Fell.

“Be nice,” Mr. Fell chastised his snake, and then added to Elena, “He’s not venomous, but he does get a bit tetchy from time to time.”The snake hissed again, this time showing off a little fang.

Elena grinned, and then all her questions spilled out.“I don’t think I’ve ever seen a snake quite like him, and I can’t quite identify him, what species is he?And he’s so long, how old is he?Where did you find him?Oh, what does he eat, is he hard to feed at all?What’s his name?”

Mr. Fell blinked.“Ah, in all honesty,” he said slowly.“I don’t think I know the answer to most of those.He’s, well... he belongs to, to, my partner?”

Elena’s eyes widened, and her queer heart fluttered hopefully in her chest.“Business partner, or...?” She trailed off meaningfully.

Mr. Fell smiled privately.“Husband.”He absently petted the snake as he spoke, and the snake’s head relaxed against his shoulder.“Crowley is awfully fond of serpents of all kinds.He knows quite a bit more about them than me.”He smiled down at the snake.“I’m just happy to have him around.”

Elena couldn’t quite hold back her delighted grin.“Cute!” she said, and then, emboldened, reached out and booped the snake on the snout.Surprised, the snake let out a loud hiss and then slithered off of Mr. Fell, knocking over a stack of books before disappearing under a bookshelf.“Uh,” Elena said, embarrassed.

Mr. Fell waved a hand, dismissing her concern.“I doubt he’ll sulk for long,” he said airily.

Elena glanced again at where the snake had disappeared from view, and then sighed quietly to herself.“Anyway,” she said reluctantly.“I’ll get out of your way.Thank you very much for letting me see your snake.”

“Of course,” Mr. Fell said warmly.

Elena let herself out as Mr. Fell bent to straighten the stack of books his partner’s snake had knocked over.Just as the door was closing, though, she thought she heard an unfamiliar male voice say, “Angel, if I didn’t like you so much—” and Mr. Fell reply, “Oh, but my dear, you really are _so_ lovely—”

Elena grinned as the door shut behind her.She’d _definitely_ have to stop in again. 

***

“I find it rather hard to believe that a bookshop owner just had a massive snake in the middle of London,” Mira said sniffily, and Elena gritted her teeth and sighed to herself.Her flatmate was quite wonderful, most days, but didn’t she just get on Elena’s nerves sometimes.

“So you think I hallucinated it, then?” Elena said waspishly, weaving her way through the crowds in Soho with Mira at her heels.

“I think sometimes you get worked up after a long day and too many espresso shots,” Mira replied primly.

Elena almost argued, but she had mistaken the coatrack in their flat for a monster just a few too many times for that argument to hold completely.“Well, I’ll show you,” she said instead.“It’s just up there.”She gestured up the street, to the corner where A. Z. Fell’s resided.

“We’ll see,” Mira said doubtfully, but she followed nonetheless as Elena made her way up the two short steps of the bookshop, checking this time to make sure that the sign on the door said the shop was open before letting herself in.

Mira stumbled to a stop behind Elena, and gazed open-mouthed at the bookshop.“Oh, my god, why haven’t I ever come in here before?” she whispered, hushed.Elena smiled in spite of herself— of course, her incurable bookworm of a flatmate, would be utterly enraptured with the kinds of books A. Z. Fell’s had to offer.

“Come on,” Elena said a tad impatiently.“You can moon over the books in a second, I want to see if Mr. Fell’s snake is around today.And _then_ you’ll know that I wasn’t hallucinating.”She reached out and grabbed Mira’s hand and gently led her through the shelves, steadfastly ignoring the way her heartbeat sped up for just a moment.Mira obligingly let Elena lead her to the little nook where the snake had been sleeping the last time, although Elena could hear her quietly gasping and exclaiming whenever she saw a book she liked. 

Unfortunately, when they reached the nook by the window, there were no snakes to be found.Instead, a lanky, red-haired man in black was sprawled in the armchair, one leg slung over the arm and a pair of dark glasses sliding down the bridge of his nose just slightly as he leafed through a newspaper.When Elena and Mira appeared he looked up, and one eyebrow crept up his forehead.

He glanced significantly at their still clasped hands, before returning to his paper and saying, “I’m all for encouraging a little risqué behavior, but I don’t think Aziraphale would much like that happening in his bookshop.”

Going red, Elena dropped Mira’s hand.“You’ve got the wrong idea,” she squeaked.The man hummed noncommittally.

“We’re looking for a snake,” Elena added hurriedly.“He was over here the other day.That’s all.Nothing, uh, nothing else.”

That made the man look up again, and Elena almost imagined he was squinting behind his glasses.“A snake?” he repeated, and then he closed his newspaper and swung his leg back over the arm of the chair so he was sitting properly.“Oh, you’re snake girl!”He grinned, and Elena honestly couldn’t tell if it was friendly or not.“Sorry, no snakes today.”

Elena tried not to let her disappointment show on her face.“How come?” she asked instead.

The man’s eyebrows somehow managed to go up even further.“How come?” he repeated.“It’s cloudy and rainy today, no self-respecting snake would be out and about.”

Elena frowned slowly, and then it _clicked_.“Wait, is the snake yours?” she asked excitedly, all disappointment forgotten.She didn’t want to judge or stereotype, but the man seemed much more like the kind of person to have a massive snake than the kindly bookshop owner.

The man’s grin somehow grew.“In a manner of speaking,” he replied.“He’s his own snake, I should say.”

Elena ignored that bit of weirdness, and said, “I have so many questions!”

“Do you, now,” the man said, and yes, that was definitely indulgent amusement in the curve of his lips.

Mira, clearly able to tell that she was gearing up for quite the interview, poked Elena on the shoulder.“I’m going to browse,” she said in a low voice.“Let me know when you want to leave.”

“Gotcha!” Elena chirped, and pulled up a convenient chair, plopping down.“How long have you had your snake?What’s his name?”

The man absently shuffled his newspaper, and said thoughtfully, “I suppose his name would be Crawly.He’s been around more or less since Eden, I should think.”

The man (Mr. Fell’s partner, he must be— which meant his name was Crowley, if Elena remembered correctly) entertained Elena’s questions for a little while, even if some of his answers were frustratingly cryptic, obviously incorrect, or just straight up bizarre.For the kind of man who wore sunglasses inside for no discernible reason other than the fact that he seemed to think it looked cool, Crowley was surprisingly patient— he seemed mostly amused by her, and genuinely interested when she started talking about her studies at university related to herpetology.

At one point, Mr. Fell himself bustled over, and seemed mildly surprised to see his partner actually being social, but didn’t interrupt.A bit later, he brought them both tea, and kissed Crowley on the top of the head, and Crowley gave him in return a scowl with absolutely no malice.At another point, Mira returned with a book in hand and found herself another convenient chair to curl up in.

Night was falling by the time Mr. Fell stopped by again, and said regretfully, “I’m sorry, my dear, but I do have to close up soon.”

Elena nodded.“Of course,” she said.

“You’re welcome to come back, of course,” he added quickly, and then gave Crowley a surprisingly teasing smile.“You’re being dreadfully kind, my dear.”

“Shut up,” Crowley drawled, flopping back in his chair as Elena got to her feet.

“Thank you,” she said with a smile.

Crowley raised one eyebrow.“Big fan of questions, me,” he replied, and then glanced up at Aziraphale.“Fancy dinner, angel?”

“That sounds lovely,” Mr. Fell replied with a warm smile.

Elena and Mira glanced at each other, and then took that as a cue to leave.Elena smiled as she let the door close behind her— she could hear Crowley and Mr. Fell playfully bickering over where they were going to go for dinner.

“So,” Mira said, bumping her shoulder with a small smile.“I didn’t see any snakes.”

Elena gaped at her, appalled.“I was _literally_ talking to Crowley about his snake for two hours?Oh my god—”

Mira laughed.“I’m winding you up.”She brushed her hair out of her face thoughtfully.“Mr. Fell was nice,” she said.“Had a lovely talk with him about some of his nineteenth century literature, and he didn’t even seem to mind that I couldn’t afford to buy anything.”

“It is a nice shop, isn’t it?” Elena added thoughtfully.She smiled slightly.“Maybe we’ll just have to go back.”

Mira’s fingers brushed the back of her hand for just a moment.“Maybe we will,” she replied. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! I'm [here](https://asideofourown.tumblr.com/) if that's something you're into.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> listen........ this wasn't even going to be more than a one-shot...... i have deadlines out the wazoo........ but sometimes you're just Possessed by the Writing Spirit and it just Needs to be done...............
> 
> (i know i haven't gotten the chance to answer the comments on the first chapter of this, but please know that i've read, loved, and appreciated every one <3)
> 
> Enjoy!

Mira plopped down on Elena’s bed, flopping over to rest her head in her girlfriend’s lap.“So,” she said with a wide grin when Elena set aside her coursework and raised an eyebrow at her.“Conspiracy theory time.”

“Oh?” Elena laughed.She ran her fingers through Mira’s newly short hair, ruffling it up.“Shoot.”

Mira’s smile widened, and she rolled onto her stomach before resting her chin in her hands.“We’ve been to Ezra Fell’s bookshop plenty in the last few years,” she started out.

Elena hummed, rolling her pen back and forth over her bedspread.“Considering we never buy anything, we have,” she replied.

Mira rolled her eyes.“Please, you know that’s the only reason he lets us keep coming back.That, and Crowley likes you.”She refocused.“Anyway, Crowley!That’s my conspiracy theory.”

Elena laughed.“Honestly, that on its own is valid,” she said.“The man is a walking, talking scheme.”Mira pouted at her, and she was so cute that Elena had no choice but to duck down and kiss her quickly.

Mira kissed her back, and then laid her head against Elena’s thigh and gazed up at the ceiling, scattered with peeling glow-in-the-dark star stickers.“No, no, listen,” she said. She had been mulling this theory over for a while, and was quite excited to finally share. “We’ve been to Mr. Fell’s tons.We’ve had tea with Mr. Fell and Crowley a bunch.And we’ve hung around and done coursework plenty while Mr. Fell does whatever he does and Crawly the snake sleeps in the sun.But, think, have you ever _actually_ seen Crowley and Crawly in the same room at the same time?”

Elena blinked.“What?” she said, and then tilted her head slightly to one side, baffled.“You’re not suggesting—“

“That Crowley is some kind of shapeshifter and that sometimes he turns into a snake and his husband wears him like a scarf? Yes, yes I am,” Mira replied.“Personally, my bet’s on that he’s one of the Fae.”She reached up, gently poked at Elena’s cheek.“Is that really so far-fetched?”

Elena spluttered.“Um, yes?”

Mira smiled crookedly.“I know you’re a big scientific scientist, almost-Dr. Ramirez,” she teased.“But you have to admit that A. Z. Fell’s doesn’t exist in the same universe that we do.”

Elena shrugged, frowning thoughtfully.Mira traced her finger in small figure-eights and hearts and stars on Elena’s knee while she waited patiently for her to think.

They had both been going to A. Z. Fell’s together for a while, long enough to kind of _notice_ things_._Notice the way that time seemed to pass a little differently there, that small problems casually mentioned to Mr. Fell would sometimes miraculously resolve themselves, that unpleasant people found themselves conveniently inconvenienced just after crossing paths with Crowley, that the owner and his husband didn’t seem to age (and hadn’t aged in a good several decades, if the photos Mira had once accidentally stumbled across from the 1940s were any indication).

Mira was more than happy to believe in the quiet magic of the place, happy to enjoy it without saying much.Elena mostly left her cognitive dissonance between science and magic alone.

“So,” Mira asked, gazing up at her girlfriend with puppy dog eyes.“Wanna help me try to prove it?”

One of the many things that Mira loved about Elena was the fact that she was quite willing to get on board with absolute bullshit.She well knew, of course, that Elena didn’t believe for a second that Anthony J. Crowley was a part-time snake, or a shapeshifter, or anything more fantastical than a grumpy, aging, queer goth with a surprisingly large soft spot for snakes and houseplants and curious young people.

But when Mira asked for her help, Elena hesitated only a moment before the corner of her mouth lifted in a small smile.“Might be funny.Sure.”

Mira pulled her down for a delighted kiss, and they both forgot about their responsibilities for a little while.

***

The next time Mira and Elena dropped by Mr. Fell’s bookshop, they were armed with donut holes and a Plan.The Plan was sketchy at best, of course, and had a lot of ‘???’s and ‘go with the flow’s, but Mira hoped enthusiasm would make up for any gaps.

The little bell above the door jingled when the two women entered, and Mira breathed a small sigh of relief as they stepped in.It was horribly cold outside, wet and slushy and freezing, and she kind of hated January.As always, though, the bookshop was the perfect temperature— warm and cozy, lit with soft yellow lamps whose light faded into gentle shadows at the corners of the room.

Surprisingly, there were a few other customers in the bookshop when they entered, probably taking shelter from the miserable weather.Two teenagers browsed Mr. Fell’s small collection of modern literature, giggling and poking at each other as they read the flaps of books, an older woman seemed to be dozing in an out-of-the-way armchair with a newspaper crumpled in her hands, and a young man in a long, sleek coat was arguing quietly by the till with a distressed-looking Mr. Fell.Mira and Elena glanced at each other and then edged a little further inside, away from the draft of the door closing behind them.

As they approached the counter, Mira heard Mr. Fell say, “I’m _quite_ sorry, sir, but that book is not for sale at this time.”

“It must be, it was out front!” the man insisted, clutching at a book with desperate fingers.“What kind of business is this?”

Mr. Fell frowned, and Mira practically crumbled under his deep disappointment even though she was in no way the target.“I run this shop by myself, sometimes I make mistakes,” he said, and then reached out and carefully pried the book from the man’s hands.“But this one is not. For. Sale.Thank you.”

The man’s face twisted with irritation.“You’re making a mistake,” he snapped, and reached out as though to poke Mr. Fell in the chest.There was a loud hissing noise and then a scaly head popped out from under Mr. Fell’s coat, fangs bared, and the would-be customer jerked back with a yelp.“Argh!”

Mr. Fell smiled sweetly.“Good day,” he said.

The man turned on his heel and left quickly, almost mowing Mira and Elena down in the process.

Mr. Fell patted the snake’s head with a small smile, and then caught sight of them.“Oh!” he said, and gave them a happy smile.“Good afternoon, Elena, Mira.”

“Hey, Mr. Fell,” Mira said, stepping up to the counter with Elena at her heels, clutching at her bag of donut holes.She smiled, holding it up.“We come bearing gifts.”

Mr. Fell’s smile somehow brightened.“Oh, thank you, my dear girl,” he said as he took the bag, peering inside.

“There’s a couple jelly ones at the bottom for Crawly,” Elena added helpfully.The first time she had met Crowley, he had mentioned offhand that his pet snake had a fondness for jelly donuts.Elena had decided it would be better, perhaps, not to inform him that usually snakes didn’t go in for dessert.The rules of normal snakes didn’t exactly apply to Crawly, against all reason.

“Oh, how kind of you,” Mr. Fell murmured.He fished a jelly donut out of the bag and offered it to the serpent curled around his torso and snuggled under his jacket.After a moment of flat consideration, the snake gulped the donut down with a satisfied hiss.Mr. Fell turned his smile back on Mira and Elena and said, “Here for a social call, or is there something I can help with?I can put the kettle on if you like.”

Mira cleared her throat, glanced sideways at Elena.Typically, her girlfriend was distracted with cooing over Crawly, who had deigned to poke his head a little further out of Mr. Fell’s jacket to let her pet him.She was the only person (other than Mr. Fell), it seemed, who was allowed to fawn over him and keep her fingers attached.

“Actually, maybe,” Mira said, scrambling.“I’m, um, I’m working on a paper for school, about Oscar Wilde’s influence on modern era queer literature, and I thought you might have a book or two I could look at while I’m here?”

“Oh, of course,” Mr. Fell said thoughtfully.“I think I might have a thing or two I could dig up.”

“Oh, and,” Mira added as though it were an afterthought, and subtly kicked her girlfriend’s ankle.“Elena was hoping to talk to Crowley, if he’s around.”

Mr. Fell glanced down as Crawly withdrew into his jacket, apparently tired of being pet, and smiled fondly.“Oh, he’ll be around sometime,” he said vaguely.The snake under his jacket shifted, and Crawly’s snout just poked up from under his collar as he cozied up against Mr. Fell’s shoulder.Mr. Fell's smile softened and added, “He may have popped out for a bit.One of our godsons is getting married next weekend, he’s in a bit of a tizzy trying to find a good gift.”

There was an indignant hiss from under his jacket, and Mr. Fell chuckled.“Now, dear, don’t be contrary,” he said.“That's the only word to describe it, don’t you think?”

“Ooh, weather’s a bit rough for a wedding,” Mira said, and shuddered sympathetically.“Hope it’s inside.”

Mr. Fell’s eyes widened and shook his head.“Oh, no, dear me.January _would_ be dreadful for a wedding outside, wouldn’t it?No, Warlock lives in California, we’ll be flying out to the States for a week.Plenty warm there at this time of year, I’ve heard.And the day of the wedding will be perfectly nice.”

“Oh!” Elena exclaimed, her eyes widening, and Mira could tell exactly what her brilliant girlfriend was thinking.“Mr. Fell, do you need anyone to watch Crawly while you’re gone?We’d be happy to, if you do.”

Mr. Fell blinked.“Watch—? Oh, oh, no, thank you, my dear girl.That won’t be necessary.”He patted his lumpy jacket.“He’ll be just fine.”

Elena smiled beatifically.“Well, offer’s there if you need it.”

Mr. Fell gave her a genuine smile in return.“Thank you.”He straightened, tugged absently at his bowtie.“Now, Mira, let’s see if we can’t find you a book or four.”

“Thanks!” Mira chirped, and trailed after Mr. Fell.

Elena grinned, and watched them walk away.She occupied herself for a few minutes browsing the shelves of recent literature that Mr. Fell seemed most willing to part with— she couldn’t quite fathom why he might have the _Fifty Shades_ series in stock, but suspected Crowley had something to do with it— before picking out a poetry collection to flip through.She found Mira and Mr. Fell huddled together over a few thick, old books at a table in a little nook, Crawly now napping under his heat lamp, and settled in an old armchair to read.

Mira glanced over and smiled at her girlfriend before returning to the passage in Mr. Fell’s book she was skimming.It was always easy to get lost in research, and time slid on lit golden and soft until it was dark out and most of the other customers had left the bookshop.

“Oh, dear,” Mr. Fell said quietly, looking up at the clock on the wall that hadn’t been there a few moments before.Mira glanced up from her page, taking note of her girlfriend dozing in her armchair with a small smile.“It’s getting a bit late,” Mr. Fell said.He stood with a small puff of breath and stepped over to where Crawly was still snoozing.

“Crowley should be getting back soon, I expect,” Mr. Fell said, gently petting the snake’s head with three fingers.That seemed to rouse the serpent, and Crawly woke with a startled hiss before slithering off the table and into the stacks.Elena also awoke at the sound of voices, blinking blearily.

A few moments later, the bookshop’s door opened with a bang and a tinkle and then Crowley called cheerfully, “Hullo, angel, you in the back?”

“Speak of the devil,” Mr. Fell said with a small smile just as Crowley swaggered into view and greeted his husband with a quick kiss.

“How was your afternoon, dearest?” Mr. Fell asked as Crowley draped himself over his shoulders, not unlike a particularly clingy snake.

“Smashing,” Crowley said dryly.He made eye contact with Mira and then Elena, raised an eyebrow.“How’s uni?”

“Going well,” Mira answered for both of them.She glanced sideways at Elena, ecstatic.It was obvious, _so_ obvious, there was really no other explanation—

Elena made a face back at her, but she was also smiling.

“You know,” Crowley said, unlatching himself from Mr. Fell and plopping down into an armchair, sprawling as bonelessly as he always did.“I’ve gotten good over the years at recognizing questions.Big fan, always have been.Do you have a question for me, Mira Kelly?”

Mira was caught off guard— her plan with Elena had been a bit more subtle than just asking outright, they had been going to try asking Crowley if he wouldn’t mind bringing his snake in to one of Elena’s classes to see how he reacted.“Well, it’s just,” she stammered, suddenly flustered.“We’ve, _I’ve_, never seen you and Crawly in the same room at the same time, and you came back just after he left, and Elena said he’s not exactly a _normal_ snake—”

Crowley reclined in his chair and rested one ankle on the opposite knee, eyebrows raised and a faint smile on his lips.“Is that so?”

“Snakes don’t really eat jelly donuts, Crowley,” Elena said with a shrug, with the perfect certainty of someone part of the way to a doctorate and quite proud of it.“Or grab books out of aggressive customers’ hands by hanging down from the ceiling.Or dance to Queen.”

Crowley’s lips twitched at that, and Mr. Fell stifled what sounded very much like a snorting laugh.

Mira laced her fingers together, steeled herself, and then asked firmly, “Are you, or are you not, a shapeshifting member of the Fae?”

Crowley looked genuinely delighted at that.“I’m not,” he said with a surprised laugh, sitting up.“Wouldn’t _that_ be a riot, though?”

Mira widened her eyes.“But you do turn into a snake sometimes, don’t you?” she pressed, and studied him with expectant hope.

Crowley hesitated, and then glanced over at Mr. Fell.Mr. Fell was watching with a small, private smile on his face, his fingers laced together in front of him.He shrugged when Crowley seemed to catch his eye.

Crowley shrugged back and then turned to Mira and grinned sharply, practically flashing fangs.He leaned forward and slid his sunglasses down the bridge of his nose just a bit, just enough for them both to catch a glimpse of his yellow irises and slitted pupils.“Why,” he said with a small, playful smirk, and gave them a wink with snakish eyes.“I can’t ever imagine why you might think ssssomething like that.”

Mira grinned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (A year or two later, Crowley and Aziraphale are invited to another wedding. Their gifts for the brides are a rare, illustrated collection of myths and fairy tales, and a small snake. Crowley definitely doesn't cry at the ceremony)
> 
> Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed! I'm [here](https://asideofourown.tumblr.com/) if that's something you're into.


End file.
